The London System is the ultimate low-maintenance opening for White. Move your pieces to d4, Bf4, Nf3, e3, and c3.

Against Queen Pawn openings, you have two "idiot-proof" paths:

Developing with ...Nf6, ...g6, and ...Bg7. This is a "universal" setup that can be played against almost anything White throws at you, making it a staple of many simplified repertoires. Where to Find Repertoire PDFs and Guides